All good things must come to an end… (My First Annual April Fool’s Day prank!)
Edit 05 April 2010: Welcome to my first annual April Fool’s Day prank. ;)
This is difficult and a little awkward to type.
I flew into Bangkok yesterday, but when I got here I decided I just can’t do this anymore. I can’t live out of a backpack anymore. I don’t want to travel. I don’t want to experience new cultures. I don’t want to meet new people. I just don’t care. What’s happening around the world doesn’t interest me.
Back To FL!
So I’m heading back to Florida. I’ll probably buy a nice house and expensive car again, because that is truly me. The real me loves materialistic things that have no meaning.
I’m also going to upgrade my wardrobe. 3 shirts and 1 pair of pants no longer! I want a different shirt and different pants for at least every day of the month. Eventually I’ll scale that up to every day of the year, but I don’t want to go overboard right away.
The first thing I’m gonna do when I get back to the States is head to a mall, hit an Express Men, and buy some skinny jeans and tight shirts.
What does this all mean?
I don’t know.
But I want to sincerely thank you. I launched this blog exactly 9 months ago and it has been a really fun time. I appreciate the fact that you stuck around and read and commented and shared and e-mailed and gave a damn.
I plan on continuing to write here.
These things happen. If anything, it’s proof that Ridiculously Extraordinary Freedom can be anything.
Thank you for everything. I won’t be checking my e-mail or comments for a while as I gotta figure out all this getting back to the USA stuff.
Who should you listen to? The story about my most expensive, and most important, life lesson…
A friend of mine once asked me if I would give him advice on his finances if he won the lottery.
My response was simple: “Don’t take financial advice from someone who has less money than you.”
Let’s say you come into $5 million. Would you then take investment advice from an adviser who earns less than $100k/year? (Most advisers earn far less than that.)
I definitely wouldn’t.
I’d trust myself more than the adviser and I hope you would too.
But I’d also trust someone who has a proven record of making a lot of money. This could be anybody. An entrepreneur, Warren Buffet, a grandmother. It doesn’t matter who it is as long as they’ve had success with large sums of money.
This concept holds true for anything in life.
If you’re a prospective basketball star would you take advice from coaches who haven’t coached future college and NBA stars?
If you’re an entrepreneur would you take business advice from people who haven’t run successful businesses?
If you want to be a world class chef would you train at a fast food restaurant?
If you want to get fit are you going to take advice from a fat person?
Bad Advice Breeds Bad Results
It seems like common sense, yet most of us, myself included, take advice from people who have no business giving advice. Usually, at least in my case, it doesn’t work out positively.
For example, years ago when the housing boom was hitting hard everybody was saying to get in now because housing prices are going to keep rising. Deep down I knew that wasn’t true. But what was happening was so crazy my thinking became unclear and I joined in on the frenzy.
It also didn’t help that I was earning more money than I knew what to do with.
So I purchased a house that is now worth ~$150,000 less than when I bought it. (I rented it out last year so I could live anywhere.)
To write that makes me sick to my stomach, but I’m not one to run away from the truth.
Who To Blame For Bad Advice
I could blame the people I was taking advice from. I could blame the President, the banks, the real estate agents, my family, and my friends.
But there is only one person to blame for that mistake.
Nobody put a gun to my head. I didn’t have to listen.
And ever since then I’ve told myself “never again.”
Challenge Everybody
These days I challenge all advice I receive.
Buying that house was an expensive lesson, but I don’t regret learning it in the absolute worst way. It is tattooed into my hippocampus. I will never forget.
Where Does Bad Advice Stem From?
Ninety-nine percent of the time (guesstimation) bad, unwelcome advice comes from three places:
– Parents
– Other Family Members
– Friends
Granted, all of these people are well intentioned.
But intention means nothing.
How you live your life should be up to you.
“I’d rather go my own way and fail miserably than go their way and make it.” – Henry Rollins
I’m not saying we shouldn’t take advice from anybody. I’m saying we need to be careful who we’re taking advice from.
Persuasive people can easily lead us astray.
People you respect can do the same.
How I’ve Overcome Taking Bad Advice
1) Accept the advice with gratitude. Most people don’t mean any harm and like to chime in whether they should or not. Accept their advice. Thank them. Then…
2) Analyze where the advice is coming from. Is the advice from someone well suited to giving you that specific piece of advice? Yes? Great, consider it. It might be very useful to you. After all, the easiest way to learn something is from someone who has already made the mistakes for you. If they can save you from making a mistake or two that is perfect.
BUT, and it’s a big CAPITALIZED BUT, if they are giving you advice based on opinion and speculation then what you should do is simple:
If you fail without their advice you will only be able to blame yourself. No ill feelings towards the well-intentioned advice givers. And if you succeed, it will be the result of your own genius.
Make a pact with yourself that you will flat out not accept advice if it’s coming from someone who shouldn’t be dishing out those specific life lessons.
Does that mean you shouldn’t take advice from me?
Yes and no.
Don’t take my advice in areas you don’t think I have the proper experience.
For example, although I always get pretty good deals on flights, I’m not the best person to ask about that. For the most part I use FareCompare.com (BTW, their CEO Rick Seaney is awesome) and what I’ve learned from Chris Guillebeau’s travel products.
But I can tell you how to travel cheaply, how to eat vegan on the road, how to live anywhere, among many other things.
Take my advice in areas I have experience. Everything I write on this blog is based on personal experience.
It’s pretty black and white.
Do you have examples of situations where you took advice from the wrong person and it worked out unfavorably?
Do you have examples of situations where you took advice from the right person and it worked out favorably?
Or do you have examples of situations that contradict everything I’ve stated?
Leave it in the comments. I’m incredibly interested.
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P.S. I just realized the photo to this article makes no sense. Originally it was called “Who To Listen To” but I changed it at the last minute and forgot to change the photo! haha ;)
Lots of updates from India, including video of the guitar I built, and info about upcoming travels …
The big and really, only, update regarding India. 1,830 words, 4 videos and some pictures. :)
I was going to stay in India until late April. But … well … it’s just not “me.”
So I’m leaving to go to Thailand on 31 March. I’ll stay in Bangkok for about a week then head up to Chiang Mai for ~30 days before coming back to Bangkok to fly to Poland.
08-09 May looks like this:
– Train from Chiang Mai to Bangkok on 08 May
– FinnAir ($1800 Business Class ticket for $200 in taxes + 70,000 frequent flier miles!) leaves Bangkok at 12:15am on 09 May and heads to Helsinki (10 hour flight)
– Helsinki to Warszawa (FinnAir, same ticket), arriving at 10:25am (just a 1 hour flight!)
– Train from Warszawa to my hometown of Wroclaw that afternoon (6 hour train ride)
The at-the-border Thai visa is supposed to be only 30 days, but I couldn’t book any award travel until 09 May so hopefully they give me an extension without any hassle.
More on that another day…
Here’s some fun stuff from India!
1) The Guitar
I’ve had a lot of e-mails asking about the guitar.
Check out the video I made below. Don’t mind the silly editing in the beginning. I was trying to build suspense. (Did I miss my calling? Hollywood? I can be reached at 352 577-0173.)
While driving around on my scooter I ran into a heard of cows. This is a regular occurrence. For whatever reason (oh right, this shit doesn’t get old for me, I love cows!) I stopped and began videotaping. A funny thing happened …
3) Some Kind of Procession
Again, while driving around on my scooter, this happened …
Other points of interest
No Traveler’s Tummy
I eat from dirty street stands (hell, dirty restaurants in general) every day and have not had “Traveler’s Diarrhea” at all like what supposedly happens to “everybody” who comes here. I attribute this to my strengthened vegan immune system. When I used to eat meat I would get sick if somebody sneezed 10,000 miles away from me.
It’s Dirty
It really is as dirty as everybody says it is.
Let’s break it down …
a) The air is polluted as all get out. When I first got to Mumbai I went to play basketball with my CouchSurfing host and I might as well have been playing in a smoky indoor bar. My lungs were not happy. Funny thing is, the Indian kids who we played with ALL smoked during breaks. I don’t know how they do it.
Aguada Bay, Goa, India
b) Trash burning is a regular occurrence. All day. Every day. Couple that with almost 100 degree heat and you have the recipe for pleasant odors.
Cow Hanging Out In Garbage Smoke
c) There are signs everywhere stating “Don’t spit, it spreads TB.” Almost everybody spits. Gross.
d) The land is your toilet. If you need to use the toilet (yes, #1 or #2) anywhere you like is fair game.
Goan Hospitality
The Goan phrases for “hello” are …
– If you’re a taxi/rickshaw driver: “TAXI?! YES?! TAXI?!”
The taxi/rickshaw drivers here would rather stand around yelling TAXI! than drive anybody. They don’t use meters and will not drive you anywhere (even just down the road) for less than 50 Rupees, but more likely no less than 100. In comparison, in Mumbai I took a 1 hour taxi ride (~15km) for about 200 Rupees. When I was doing the guitar workshop I walked everywhere, but after that I rented a scooter for 150 Rupees/day.
To be clear: You could be 30 feet from a taxi driver and he will yell across the street for you until you acknowledge his poor salesmanship. “TAXI!? HELLO? FRIEND? TAXI? HELLO?! HELLO?!” All day long, no stopping. Every single taxi driver.
Eventually I stopped caring, because I understand they’re just trying to make a buck. (And getting the scooter meant I wasn’t affected by it anymore.) But if one smart taxi driver broke the “rules” and used his meter he’d be driving/making money all day instead of standing around wasting his voice.
Autorickshaw driver doing what he does best: nothing.
– If you’re a shopkeeper: “Hey! Look at my store! Just look!”
I’m a nice guy. So when a shopkeeper would extend a hand and say hello I would shake their hand and say hello. I learned to stop doing that quickly because once they have your hand you literally have to pry it away. Not a good way to make a sale.
I made friends with an Indian-American here and I asked him if this stuff happens to him with the taxi drivers and shopkeepers. He didn’t know what I was talking about. So we went walking down the road and every single person we passed wanted our wallets. He got annoyed real quick. :)
Beggars
I heard there would be a lot of problems with beggars but they have all been very kind. I’m not a fan of giving cash, but whenever I have food I offer that. They sometimes ask for money beyond the food, but that’s OK. Gotta hustle to live.
Interesting story: one day while walking from the market to my scooter (not a long walk) I ended up giving away all of my apples. So I went back to buy more. On the way back to my scooter this time nobody asked for my apples. Sign of respect? I don’t know, but it was nice.
The Cow Is Not Sacred?
Yay cows! On the beach! Baga Beach, Goa, India
I was talking to a woman who has been in India for decades and I mentioned that I was quite surprised when I saw a guy elbow drop a cow and other people treat them like garbage. I thought the cow was sacred in India. Her response: “What you hear in the news and from outside the country is not how it truly is.”
Essentially, I’m told from various people, cows are pests. It’s true they are everywhere, and they play in traffic, and they leave cowpies where you’d rather them not leave cowpies. But if they’re sacred they’re sacred. You treat them like gods, not like dirt. So, while most people here do not eat cows, they don’t seem to be well respected animals.
I understand Goa is different (maybe due to the large (30%) Christian population?) and I also understand my definition of “sacred” means more than just “don’t eat cows.” So my final observation on this situation is: I’m still not sure what to think.
I’m also told in rural areas it’s different and cows are, indeed, treated with the utmost respect. And that makes a little more sense. I’m an ignorant American making the only observation I can with what I was presented. Take it as you will.
Wow, that was negative, so what was good?
– I love Indian food. For less than 200 Rupees I could almost eat enough to make me puke. For illustration, here is part of a reference one of my CouchSurfing hosts left me: “We had a good time with Karol…[EDIT]…seeing him put away copious amounts of food (in a good way).”
I always laugh when people say I eat a lot because usually it comes from somebody who says they eat a lot and are astounded by my stomach capacity. I’m 6′ 5″ and I have a metabolism, much like the rest of my body, from the future. That explains that.
Massive 50 Rupee Paper Dosa (also pictured: a fresh squeezed pineapple juice)
– 20 Rupee coconuts! OK, maybe this falls into food, but it needs a separate mention. I’d never had fresh coconut before coming to India. I love coconut water and coconut meat! It’s full of fat, but that’s where my futuristic body comes into play.
– Celebrity treatment. This annoys a lot of people. I loved it, if only for the sheer wackiness of the situation. If I spent every day on the beach I’m sure it would get annoying, but I’m not a huge fan of beaches. Anyway … every time I’d go to the beach or other touristy areas I’d get swarmed by Indian men (~20-35 in age) taking pictures of and with me. They’d put their arms around me like we were best friends and give me high fives and whatnot. It always tripped me out, but it was awesome. But again, if it happened every day I can see how it could get annoying. It’s fun to be “famous” every once in a while. :)
– Nice people. In that same regard, everybody I met who wasn’t a taxi driver or shopkeeper or trying to make money from me some other way was very nice. I would go exploring on my scooter pretty much every day and in the little villages/neighborhoods around Goa lots of people would wave, kids would run out and talk to me, and people were just cool. They’d usually think I was lost, but you can’t be lost if you don’t know where you’re going. I mean that literally and philosophically. ;)
– It’s cheap. Although Goa is more expensive than most areas of India, it’s still cheap. For example, most nice (i.e. not the cheapest, not the most expensive) guest houses cost 500-800 Rupees (less than $20) for a room with attached bathroom.
I rented a nice apartment in Calangute for 18,000 Rupees/month (~$400). A year ago the cost would’ve been about 20% less. Inflation is nuts here. But again, still cheap. And that price included a living room, bedroom with queen bed, cable TV (haha, pretty useless for me, but it was there), a nice outside porch, and every other day house cleaning (including new sheets/towels).
And if I was the old me I estimate I could get completely shit-faced for about $10/day. Speaking of alcohol, there’s a local Goan alcohol called Fenny (~$1 for 60mL) made from cashews (Goa is known for its cashews, mmmmm) that I wanted to try. So I did. Not drinking for 4 months was easy. And I haven’t drank for a month or so since I tried the Fenny.
Conclusion
Even though India is not “me” doesn’t mean I didn’t have a good time. It’s just not “me” that’s all. It’s kind of the whole Right People thing.
Unrelated, but Kirsty over at NerdyNomad.com just released an awesome eBook called The Underground Guide To International Volunteering. I named it. ;) And yes, I bought a copy as well ($14). If you’re interested in International volunteering this has a lot of great info from someone who’s been doing it for years: http://www.nerdynomad.com/volunteering (not an affiliate link) – $7 from every sale goes to Hands On Disaster Response. Kirsty is currently in Haiti volunteering with HODR, helping clean up after the massive earthquakes.
Also, I’m going to interview Kirsty about how she makes money passively, which allows her to travel the world perpetually, for Version 1.0 of How To Live Anywhere. :)
When I was young I wanted to live to 100. To my mind it might as well have been infinity. (I thought China was a different planet when I was 4 so maybe 100 was infinity.)
Then I got older and I didn’t want to live to anything.
Now I want to live to 100 again. As you know, I like the number 100. Actually, I’d like to live to infinity. (Wait, is China a different planet? What’s happening here? … help?)
Anyway, 29 is still very young, and I don’t claim to know it all. What I do know is what I know, you know? ;)
Much like Finding Your Right People I’ve had this post ready for a long time. I was a little bit afraid to post it, but it may be The Ultimate Filter (like The Ultimate Warrior with less color and no steroids). Maybe tomorrow I start with a blank slate.
Probably not.
I expected a lot of RSS unsubscribes after posting Finding Your Right People. Instead, my subscriber count increased by 83. For a regular traffic day that is incredible (for this site). Thank you for hangin’ out in my backyard.
This list was originally 99. Then I edited some out. Then I added some. Then I edited some out. Truth be told I think I could easily hit 1,000. But right now it’s 101. A nice, easy number we’ll also call Infinity + 1.
Infinity + 1 Lessons Karol Has Learned In 29 Years:
Friends really do come and go. Some come back. Some don’t. That’s OK.
Nobody cares about you as much as they care about themselves.
Animals kill to survive. Humans kill for “fun” (also know as a psychopath) or because they’re ignorant of torture (I know I used to be).
It’s OK to be different.
Most people won’t agree with you.
The people who really care will still care whether they agree with you or not.
If the music you listen to is on the radio or TV it’s pop music. Pop = popular. It doesn’t matter if there’s screaming or singing, loud guitars or soft piano, it’s pop music. I love pop music. I love unpopular music as well. ;)
You’re not as different as you think.
You can have anything you want.
You never have to settle. Not in a relationship, not in a job, not ever.
Somebody will always tell you your ideas suck. Take action anyway.
You might think you’re not good enough, but you’ll surprise yourself when you try.
Smoking is gross. Kissing a smoker is grosser.
You don’t have to be promiscuous because you’re a male and you don’t have to be celibate because you’re a female. Do what you want.
Don’t let the school system brainwash you into being average. They will try. Every step of the way.
Society wants you to be average as well, but you can be exceptional if you’d like. It’s your choice.
If you think you can do something you’re right. If you think you can’t do something you’re also right.
The refrigerator light doesn’t always stay on.
Whether you hear it or not, a falling tree always makes a sound.
Money is not the root of all evil.
Love of money is not the root of all evil either.
You don’t need as much money as you think.
Nobody cares what kind of car you drive. If they do, they’re not worth your time. (Also, replace car with: the kinds of clothes you wear.)
Don’t be a pushover.
Memories are priceless. Write them down daily. Even if they seem trivial.
Nothing is trivial.
Ask for what you want. If you don’t ask, you won’t receive.
Don’t make the same mistake twice. If you do, don’t make it a third time.
There will always be somebody more “successful” than you.
Define your own rules for success. It’s a lot easier to rule your world than someone else’s world.
Humans are the only mammals that drink milk after they’ve grown. They’re also the only mammals that drink another mammal’s milk.
If you don’t feel good you probably don’t need a doctor. It’s your diet.
Even if an apple a day doesn’t keep the doctor away it sure tastes good.
Doctors aren’t all bad, but many will write you any prescription you ask for if you know how to ask.
The fact that gay marriage is not recognized is an abomination. If you support Freedom, you support gay marriage.
Religion causes a lot of problems.
Telling someone they’re wrong never leads to anything positive. Even if they’re wrong.
You’ll never be good enough if you don’t define great.
Being dependent on TV shows or sports teams is for children and teenagers.
You don’t need more than 3 pairs of shoes. 1 athletic, 1 dress, and 1 casual. Even that might be overkill.
If you wear the same pants every day nobody will notice.
Write down your dreams/nightmares for 30 days every morning immediately upon waking up. Some trippy stuff will start happening.
It is scientifically proven that if you eat meat you’re not an environmentalist. Don’t pretend to care about the environment. Care or don’t care.
Whether global warming is real or made up, is it really so difficult to throw a cigarette butt in a trash can instead of the street? (Replace the following with cigarette butt: gum, paper, bottles, anything.)
If you say you love animals and you kill them for dinner (physically or by shopping at the deli counter) there is a blatant disconnect.
Just because somebody tells you something is true, doesn’t mean it is. Do your own research.
Jealousy is mankind’s most useless emotion. Instead of feeling jealous, feel happy.
Happiness is mankind’s most useful emotion.
If you help people get what they want, you will “miraculously” get what you want.
It’s OK to be a follower. It’s better to be a thought leader.
It’s OK if you don’t like something. Just don’t pretend that you do.
There are exceptions to every rule. That doesn’t make the rule invalid.
You can’t break rules if you don’t learn them first.
If somebody tells you they want the best for you what they mean is they want you to do what they say and follow the rules.
You should play on a swing set at least once every year. It is guaranteed to bring a smile to your face.
Don’t blame anybody for your problems. They’re yours. The sooner you establish this the sooner you can work on them.
If you can’t sing, sing anyway. Especially at karaoke.
Just because a billion people do something doesn’t mean it’s right.
If you eat moldy bread you might feel like shit. Pun not intended. :)
Don’t wish, do. “I wish I could…” is a waste of thought energy.
Some people say you should do something every day that scares you. That’s a lofty goal, but even if you do something every week that scares you you’ll come out ahead.
Do what scares you.
If you think something is a bad idea, it might mean you should do it. Or it might mean it’s actually a bad idea.
It really is easier to ask for forgiveness than to ask for permission. Try it next time.
It’s OK if you don’t want to travel the world. There are lots of things to explore in your own backyard.
Don’t listen to anybody who tells you “you’re missing out” by not going somewhere or doing something. You’re only missing out if you believe you’re missing out.
Don’t think of cost. Think of value.
If something is expensive that doesn’t mean it’s worth it. If something is cheap that doesn’t mean it’s not. Usually, neither of those options are ideal.
Maybe you can’t have it all. That doesn’t mean you shouldn’t try.
You can change the world because you define your world.
Jakfruit is hard to find, but so very worth it.
Give away something you love. You’ll learn a) detachment and b) it feels great.
Do activities by yourself. Solo Social Activities (movies, dinner, concerts, travel) can be a lot of fun.
Stop depending on other people.
It’s OK to complain sometimes. Don’t make it a habit.
Do what you love even if you don’t get paid for it.
Stop texting or checking your phone when you’re with other people. It’s rude and it’s sad.
Drink more water.
Show gratitude.
Make more mistakes.
There is no such thing as luck. No good luck. No bad luck. You either make good things happen or you make bad things happen. Nothing more, nothing less.
The secret to winning is playing. Often. (This advice does not hold for games of chance.)
Everybody lies. Trust people anyway.
If you dwell on past mistakes you will get depressed. Dwell or don’t dwell, but know the outcome.
There is always more you can do. But that doesn’t mean there is always more you should do.
Making decisions isn’t always easy, but procrastinating on making a decision is worse than making a wrong decision.
I’ll tell you where this is coming from.
After closing down registration for the Ridiculously Extraordinary Member’s Area last Friday I got a handful of e-mails asking where to sign up. Because I’m a man of my word, once registration was closed, it was closed. Maybe I closed it a few minutes early, maybe I closed it a few minutes late, but around 10:30am EST it was closed.
As she states in that article, just because you’re not my Right People, it doesn’t mean you’re my wrong people.
And here’s the thing: I don’t necessarily decide if you’re my Right People. You decide that on your own.
My Right People don’t have to be pushed or prodded.
You comment on this blog, you share posts with friends on twitter and facebook and elsewhere, you send me a short succinct e-mail with a question or comment (or sometimes a long e-mail thanking me for something) and you take action when there is action to be taken.
You respect my time, my views, and my information. And in return, I respect yours.
And most importantly, you respect the fact that when I say I’m going to do something, I do it. So while it would be cool to let 4 additional people into the Member’s Area, it’s just not “Right.”
It’s A Touchy Subject
It almost feels like it’s an exclusivity thing, doesn’t it? Like if you don’t fit perfectly into the puzzle we shouldn’t be friends.
It goes beyond that.
“The people who need my message in my form will get it.” – Havi Brooks
Maybe my message isn’t right for you and that’s cool. It’s OK if we don’t vibe or if you don’t want to be here. That’s the beauty of all of this.
You can choose to be a Ridiculously Extraordinary Freedom Fighter or you can choose not to be. Everything I do is a filter. Everything I write is a filter. It helps make your decision easier. You’re welcome. :)
Freedom Fighters come in all forms, but there are common traits. It’s more of a feeling, actually. It’s not something I can synthesize into words on a blog post. It’s not something you can put a finger on either.
It just is.
You Should Create Filters Too
There is no sense in spending your life attracting people who aren’t your Right People. But the only way to find your Right People is to create filters. Your favorite hobby is a filter. Your lifestyle is a filter. Your point of view is a filter. Your job, where you live, what you eat, what you don’t eat, the type of music you listen to, how you treat others … these are all filters.
How A Filter Filters
Your Right People don’t have to have the same interests as you. They don’t have to have the same hobbies. You can actually have almost nothing in common. What it boils down to is respect. Your Right People will acknowledge everything about you, whether they agree or disagree, and still support you.
More …
I’ve been meaning to write this article ever since I read about Havi’s Right People concept. It took me a while to get it out and I’ve already begun adding more filters here. There are even more on the way.
I hope, if my filters filter you away, that you find your Right People. It’s important and I want you to have your Right People.
Because if you’re not living life with your Right People you’re not living life.
[If you’re reading this via RSS or e-mail and the video doesn’t show please click here to watch.]
Failure doesn’t exist. Feedback does.
Do you see how if we reframe Failure as Feedback it takes on a whole new meaning?
In the standard sense of the definition, I fail often.
Below I’ve written about some of my failures and you should watch the complementary video as well… :)
On Failure:
I don’t know a single successful person who hasn’t failed multiple times. Most likely hundreds of times.
A lot of people would consider my recent eBook launch a failure since, in the scheme of eBook launches, I didn’t generate a crazy amount of revenue. I look at it as an incredible success.
Here’s why:
1) I shipped. So what if the eBook wasn’t perfect? It’s good, people are enjoying it, and I got it out there. Success!
2) I raised money for a good cause. I sent $1,600 to Kiva. This is going to directly affect the lives of a bunch of third world entrepreneurs! (This comes after #1 because if not for #1 there wouldn’t have been a #2.)
Click the image for Full Size
3) I get a new kind of feedback on my work. Once someone spends money with you the relationship changes. It’s a position I don’t take lightly. My aim is to over deliver. Which is why I write so much here; for the sheer love of sharing ideas.
Let’s look at other examples of Failure -> Feedback:
I hurt my arm a few weeks back while building a guitar so I got an ayurvedic oil massage that didn’t end up helping (but did make for an “interesting” experience!). That was a failure. But I reframed it as feedback, found a better ayurvedic massage clinic, and was healed in 1 day. (Crazy, but true!)
When I couldn’t get Internet and, as a result, couldn’t get work done because of the ridiculous new bureaucracy here in India I felt it was a failure. I even wrote about it (whined about it is more like it) here. Sometimes I’m dense and it takes me a little extra time to take your advice and my own advice. :) Anyway, eventually, when I reframed the failure as feedback, I got my Internet and was able to produce a crazy amount of content in a short amount of time.
We don’t learn from our failures.
We learn from the feedback we get from our failures.
Avoiding Failure Is Not The Goal
Let’s be clear that avoiding failure is not the goal. More than that, a life without failure is boring.
And, of course, avoiding failure is impossible.
The goal is to achieve success or failure as soon as possible. If that means 10-20 hours in electronic stores trying to get a USB modem then so be it. :)
Sometimes we get too caught up in our lives to allow ourselves to step back and analyze what’s going on. Now that I’ve put my thoughts on the relationship of failure and feedback down into words I’ll have a much easier time dealing with failure in the future.
Now that you’ve read this article, I hope you’ll have an easier time with your failures as well. :)
I’m interested: how do you deal with your failures? Do you beat yourself up over them? Do you get depressed? Do you use them as learning experiences? What steps do you take?
Whoa, that’s a lot of questions, but I’m fascinated with failure, feedback, and success. Post in the comments or, if you’d like some level of anonymity, e-mail me: KarolGajda AT Gmail.com. More important than anything, be honest with yourself when answering the questions.
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EDIT (March 11, 2010): This is weird/cool. Penelope Trunk and Dragos Roua both wrote about failure recently.
After yesterday’s post about “Thank You” I felt compelled to write this post. Yes, my post schedule is completely off this week, but that’s OK.
A lot of fun things have been happening with friends and I want to share that with you. If you’re reading this blog then you’ll probably like what they’re doing too.
I’ve numbered them, but they’re in no particular order.
No, that’s not an affiliate link. While I am an affiliate, this is bigger than putting money in my pocket. I think you should consider getting UnAutomate Your Finances if you’re in debt.
I’ve read it, it’s actionable, it’s doable. I like that type of shit. I know, wtf, spending money if you’re in debt? The truth is you don’t need this book. You don’t need any book. But if you don’t know what to do, this is a highly recommended action plan you can follow.
On a related note: I’ve written a post called “How To Deal With Debt” that I still haven’t posted. In that one I’ll use an affiliate link for Baker’s eBook. ;) Dealing with debt is an important step to living anywhere, so we’ll cover that when the time comes.
2) Minimalism
Everett Bogue has been on fire lately. He interviewed me in January. That’s not part of the “on fire,” but I digress … just a few weeks ago he released a practical eBook on minimalism called The Art of Being Minimalist. Although I don’t really write too much about minimalism here, it’s a way of life I subscribe to.
After reading Everett’s eBook I was compelled to send him a 2,400 word essay about minimalism that will either be included in an update of his book or shared with you some other way.
Thank you for joining my Ridiculously Extraordinary Movement. You rock for being here. :)
4) Use Your Skills For Good
In early January Shannon Albert made a post asking for help brainstorming an online project. In essence, she was wondering how to monetize her skills. I made a comment on that post even though I didn’t directly offer any advice. I had a feeling I knew what Shannon was going to do.
See, before I even started RidiculouslyExtraordinary.com I e-mailed Shannon for help with the design. I designed this blog myself, but without her help, it would look like poop. (Yes, I did just use poop instead of crap or shit, what of it?!)
You can now hire Shannon to create a blog from scratch or help you with setting up WordPress, among other things: http://shannonalbert.me/blog-services/
The video I have planned for Friday also references Shannon’s “brainstorming” blog post. It’s about Tools. And it’s important.
See you tomorrow with a new video: “Failure Doesn’t Exist.”
The title is misleading. This is about the future of Ridiculously Extraordinary and about shipping, being an artist, and being a linchpin. Read it now…
(Important notes in the Don’t Skip This section of this article. If you skip the article, please read those.)
As you may know I’ve been having a difficult time with technology here in India.
A few days ago I spent 3 hours trying to get a USB Modem. Total time spent on trying to get an Internet connection the past couple weeks? At least 10 hours, but probably closer to 20 hours.
The internet wouldn’t really be an issue if I didn’t have things to ship. (More on that in the Don’t Skip This section below.)
I understand it’s because of terrorists and all of these rules are new so it’s a bit of a mess on all sides. And while the rules didn’t stop the restaurant bombing last week in Pune, maybe it is stopping the frequency of similar bombings. (I doubt it.)
Disagreeing with the way things are does nothing for me.
Figuring out how to make things happen in spite of the way things are causes change.
While sitting frustrated in my guest house what a lot of you commented/e-mailed me with during my whiny post a couple weeks ago finally hit me: “It’s not the end of the world.”
So I don’t have Internet. Who cares?
I can’t get any work done. (more on that in a bit!) Who cares?
I scheduled blog posts and I can’t respond to or moderate comments on my blog in a timely fashion. It sucks, and I feel bad, but you will stick around or you won’t.
Obviousy I want you to stick around and I figure you probably understand I can’t be stuck to my computer moderating/responding/commenting when I don’t have Internet. :)
Some people tell me Goa is a bit backwards (as far as tech and a few other things) and I should head somewhere else. While that sounds like a good plan, I’m not interested in being on the road. I want to stay put and get work done. i.e. Ship! (more on that in a bit)
If I’m going to leave it’s to move on to where I want to go, not some random place in search of an “easier time.”
I actually never planned on coming to India in the first place, so it’s all a bonus. I planned on going to Thailand and when I heard about the guitar workshop I’m taking (I’m just finishing the guitar as this post goes live!) I decided to delay Thailand and head to India.
So again, India’s a bonus.
I’ve made a couple of friends and met a bunch of people I never would have met had I not come. Bonus.
I’ve been able to eat some of my favorite foods daily. Bonus.
Said coconut is chopped open with a machete in front of my eyes. Free show. Bonus!
If you’ve read this far, thank you.
If you enjoy what I’ve been doing here, thank you.
If you’ve e-mailed me or commented and haven’t received a response yet, thank you for your patience, I’m catching up. :)
I appreciate you hanging out here.
Oh, and by the way, once I stopped worrying about it, and after another (short!) visit to the electronics store, I ended up getting a USB modem and one month of high speed internet for 4,000 Rupees! ;)
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Don’t Skip This Part. ;)
In other news, I’m working on something interesting.
Well, 3 things.
– A free newsletter and e-course about achieving Ridiculously Extraordinary Freedom. It will be focused on the Freedom aspect of this site and not so much on the other topics I talk about. (You know, like how I cured my allergies.)
– A corresponding eBook called “Ridiculously Extraordinary Freedom: How To Live Anywhere” which will be released using an incremental pricing model, starting at 10 cents and going up 10 cents after every sale. The sooner you buy, the less you pay. First day sales (+ my matching of that amount) will go to third world entrepreneurs via Kiva.org.
– An over-the-shoulder, here’s what I’m doing (including live examples), paid membership area. Because I get a lot of e-mails/questions about what I do, I’m releasing a paid membership area where you can look over my shoulder and see actual live niche projects I’m working on. I’m currently working on something unique I call “Product Leasing” in which I sell a product I didn’t write and don’t own. And it’s NOT about affiliate programs. I don’t know if anybody else is doing this. If they are, they’re keeping quiet about it.
To get on the notification list for the member’s area and ebook launches just fill out your name and primary e-mail address. (Don’t worry, I hate spam, and you won’t get it from me.)
I hadn’t planned on releasing the newsletter (the e-course isn’t even close to “ready”) or eBook (barely started it!) for a while and I didn’t even have the idea for the membership area. Then I read Linchpin by Seth Godin and a quote from Tim Ferriss: “The timing is never right.”
The main takeaways I got from Linchpin were: “Artists ship” and “Give gifts.” (Another takeaway: sprinting, getting an enormous amount of work done in a short amount of time, is good on an irregular basis. The next 10 days I’m going to be sprinting.)
While I have been shipping (and hopefully giving gifts) by consistently posting to this blog, I don’t think that’s enough. So maybe you can understand my frustration with the internet issues. I wasn’t able to ship!
What was also stopping me was my lizard brain (Seth Godin term) telling me “These things won’t be successful, you don’t have enough readers yet.” Which may be true, but whatever. It’s happening.
Here is how it’s all going down:
This Thursday (Feb 25, 2010) you’ll read a free article called “How To Make Money With Free Traffic” with an action plan to earn an extra $300/month passively.
Next Monday (March 1, 2010) I’m releasing the Freedom Fighters newsletter/e-course.
Next Friday (March 5, 2010 at Midnight EST) comes the eBook. You could consider that Thursday night if you wish. But it’s being released on Friday because that’s my birthday and I’m going to send all the money (x2) generated that day to third world entrepreneurs via one of my favorite sites: Kiva.org. I don’t have enough readers here to write as large a check as I’d like, but that’s ok. Artists ship. ;)
Then on Monday March 8, 2010 comes the membership area.
Join the notification list for the member’s area and ebook launches here (hint: you’ll get a discount):
Again, if you’re reading via RSS/e-mail and the form doesn’t show up, fill it out right here.
Whew! Thanks for reading. And thanks for being such a big part of everything I do here.
by Seth Godin and a quote from Tim Ferriss: “The timing is never right.”