How To Love What You Hate (A Simple 3 Step Process)

Have you ever hated something you wish you could love? Exercise, diet, anything? If so, here is how to love…

If you’ve read my Get Fit In 1 Minute article you know I hate running.

But what I love is experimenting with things I hate. That’s the key. Experimentation.

While here in Goa, India I’ve learned to love running. “Barefoot” (in Vibram Five Fingers) on the beach.

By this time next year I will have run a marathon. Somewhere warm, of course. ;)

That may be a lofty goal considering I’ve only run more than a few miles once in my life. It was a 5 mile run six years ago in the middle of a Michigan Winter (below freezing!) to get White Castle at 4am. :)

The Experimentation Process

Step 1) Realize that you probably don’t hate what you think you hate. You simply hate the way you’ve been going about that thing.

Step 2) Seek out alternatives. There should be at least a few viable alternatives to whatever it is you hate. Write them down in the order you’d like to test them out.

Step 3) Test the alternatives one by one until you’ve found an iteration you love.

Examples from e-mails and comments I’ve received:

“I want to start a blog, but I hate writing.”

How about a video blog? Or a podcast? Both are viable alternatives.

Even just a Twitter account can make you “famous.” If a book deal isn’t coming or already there for ShitMyDadSays, it’s coming. (If you follow me on Twitter you’ll be famous (or something) too: @KarolGajda)

“I hate fruits/vegetables, but I want to eat healthier.”

It’s impossible to hate every fruit/vegetable, so find fruits/vegetables you’ve never tasted before and taste them. When you find one you like (and you will) eat it regularly, while continuously trying other fruits/veggies.

“I hate exercise, but I want to get fit.”

More than likely you don’t hate exercise, you just hate the exercises you’ve been doing. I used to hate exercise too, so I can relate.

It’s a pain in the ass to find one, but there is some form of exercise that you will love. My favorites are riding my bike and jumping rope. And now I’m learning to love barefoot running along the beach. How is THAT for specific? I could very easily have never even tried running barefoot on the beach because every other time I’ve ever “tried running” I hated it.

It’s OK To Quit An Experiment

It’s important to remember that as you’re going through the Hate -> Love Experimentation Process you might hate some of the things you experiment with. There is nothing wrong with quitting and experimenting with the next thing on the list.

It’s Not OK To Quit Experimenting

Until you’ve flipped that hate into love, of course. ;)

I could list examples from my own life for pages, but I’d like to know situations where you’ve turned something you once hated into something you now love.

18 thoughts on “How To Love What You Hate (A Simple 3 Step Process)”

  1. Fine, fine. I’ll eat this apple on my desk instead of purchasing (another) bag of Cheetos from the vending machine. And I will “love” it. Maybe.

  2. Yes! I used to hate running but starting slowly with a start to run podcast, someone cheering me on and some happy music – much better! Running barefoot on a beach sounds almost heavenly
    Same thing with vegetables – I discovered a few years ago I love them in all kind of wok-recipes!

    1. Hi Elke!

      Awesome! For some odd reason, I usually don’t like listening to music when I’m working out. I use workout time as thinking time. That’s when I get most of my ideas (including blog post ideas).

      Mmmmm…wok! :)

      Karol

      1. Maybe when I can run for a reasonable time I´ll go without too, but for now, I find it very easy that someone is telling me to stop and start running without me having to keep track of time.
        The music is more like background for me – it doesn´t really interfere with my thinking. I am a woman after all, and there is nothing that can stop my head from thinking :P

  3. Okay, I’m trying real hard to love that heart mosaic you got going on up there. Wait, I would love to delete it does that count? :)

    But seriously, I’m with Elke. During the rainy season here in the Northwest, I tend to use my Nordic Trak a lot but it is soooo boring. I just hate it.

    Then there are a few really entertaining radio programs on the CBC that I don’t get to listen to because I never really have time where I can just “listen”.

    I have found that most of the shows are available on podcast, so now I put the two activities together for a win-win. The Nordic Traking requires so little attention, that I can enjoy the podcast and before I know it, I’ve burned 300 extra calories.

  4. Step #1 is right on. Change your “I have to…” to “I get to…” — perspective is everything

  5. Hi..just recently found you…enjoying your blog. Had to laugh at Glenn’s comment re trying to love the heart mosaic. I was just wondering where I could find a poster of it! lol Loving eating right these days…still love the junk food, but it’s all about balance. I’m finding that I can slowly replace the majority of the sugary stuff with healthier foods and feel fantastic and energetic as an exchange! Still trying to love the exercise though. Want to try the barefoot beach running but it’s still too cold here for that. Maybe in another few weeks.

      1. Thanks for the link! I’ll have to let the barefoot beach running wait until warmer weather but I’ll check in! Great blog!

  6. Hey Karol—

    A couple things….

    CONGRATS on committing to a marathon. It will be well worth it. When you decide where you are going to run let me know.

    ShitMyDadSays not only has a book deal but CBS has paid the son who started it for the rights to make a sitcom based on it. I doubt the show will succeed, but quite a whirlwind last 7 months for that guy.

    Exercise is fun…if you choose the one for you. You mention it here and I can’t stress variety enough.

    David Damron
    LifeExcursion & The Minimalist Path

    1. Thanks David! It will probably be somewhere hot and humid. Quite possibly Florida.

      That’s awesome he got a book deal and CBS TV deal!

  8. Karol, What a great way to frame it: experiment!! By experimenting it will make me more open minded and objective to my experience. I love it!!
    Thanks Karol!

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